aku memang dah lama tak tulis blog

Aku memang dah lama giler tak tulis blog. Tak sempat bercampur baur dengan tahap kemalasan yang maksimum. Aku lebih ralit dengan benda lain bila mengadap komputer ni. paham-paham jela kalau dah mengadap internet. rasanya sesiapa yang mengenali aku di UIA akan sangat mengenali aku yang sangat fokus kepada benda yang mengarut daripada benda yang berfaedah. brain lebih fokus kepada komik dan youtube. friendster pun dibuka bila rasa dah lama sangat tak buka.

Bila aku cakap kat kawan-kawan aku yang aku nak keje di Kelantan sangat ramai yang memberi sokongan. Thanx a lot friends. tapi hakikatnya mencari kerja di kawasan ini memanglah susah. aku selalu geleng kepala. aku selalu cakap kat mak aku..."che..last skali..adik mesti jadik cikgu kan?." Me..? Being a teacher? It sounds a bit weird and believe me...aku memang tiada niat untuk menjadi seorang guru. apatah lagi profesyen perguruan ini sangatlah memerlukan kesabaran yang tinggi. No...! I am not a patient girl. aku hormati profesyen ini and seriously I don't wanna ruin it with any of my attitude though my sister said that I suit to be a teacher. An ENGLISH teacher. hahaha...that's the worst part of my life. Not that I hate the subject. It's just that I am not good in explaining languages to other people. You know what I mean?

sejak akhir-akhir ini juga terlalu banyak idea datang mencurah-curah. teringat kenangan lama di mana hobi aku lebih kepada berkarya dan jadi mek jiwang. hahahaha...I'm good at writing u know.

Tree, leaf and wind : The tree part

This is a forwarded e-mail. It's a nice short story. I hope you'll like it.

Tree

The reason I'm called tree is because I'm good at painting trees.
Overtime I start to use a tree on the right hand corner as a trademark for all my watercolors painting.
I have dated 5 girls when I was in Pre-U.There's one gal who I love a lot but never dare to go after her.
She doesn't have a pretty face, doesn't have a good figure, and doesn’t have outstanding charm.She is just a very ordinary gal.
I like her.
I really like her.
Like her innocent, like her frankness.
Like her cuteness, like her intelligence and her fragility.
Reason for not going after her is because I felt somebody so ordinary like her is not a good match for me.I'm afraid that after we are together all the good feelings will vanish.I'm also afraid other's gossips will hurt her.
I felt that if she's my girl, she will be mine ultimately & I don't have to give up everything just for her.
The last reason, made her accompany me for 3 years.
She watched me chasing after gals, and I have made her heart cried for 3 years.
She wanted to be a good actress and I was a very demanding director.
When she saw me holding hands with my 2nd girlfriend, she just smiled.
The next day, her eyes were swollen like a walnut.
I purposely didn't want to think about the cause for her to cry but laughed at her the whole day.
When everybody went back home, she stayed alone crying in the classroom.She didn't know that I returned from soccer training to get something.
I watched her cry for an hour or so.

My 4th girlfriend didn't like her.
There was once when both of them quarreled.I know that based on her character she was not the type that would start off the quarrel.But I still sided with my girlfriend.
I shouted at her and her eyes were filled with shock.
I didn't care about her feelings and walked away with my girlfriend.
The next day, she still laughed & joked with me like nothing had ever happened.
I knew that she was very hurt but she didn't know that my heart ached as bad as hers.

When I broke up with my 5th girlfriend, I asked her out.
After going out for a day, I told her that I have something to tell her.She told me that coincidentally, she had something to tell me too.
I told her about my break up and she told me about her getting together.
I know the guy.
He has been going after her for quite a while.
A very cute, full of energy, lively and interesting guy.
His pursuit for her has been the talk of the school.
I can't show her my heart ache but could only smile & congratulate her.
When I reach home, the heart ache is so strong that I can't stand it.
It's like a heavy weighted stone on my chest.
I couldn't breathe.Wanted to shout but can't.Tears rolled down & I broke down & cry.
How many times have I seen her cry for the man that doesn't acknowledge her presence?
During graduation, I read an sms in my hp.
It was sent 10 days ago when I broke down and cry.
I haven't read it since then.

It says "Leaf departs is it because of the blowing Wind or because Tree didn't ask her to stay?"

currently

Book: The Ambler Warning , Robert Ludlum.
Satu Janji, Ramlee Awang Murshid.
Songs: Peach, Ai Otsuka.
Endless Story, Yuna Ito.
Hajimari No Kaze, (can't remember who sings da song)
Movie: Nana.
Drama series: Spring Waltz, Numb3rs, CSIs, The Man of the Vineyard.
Comics: Fruits Basket, Nana
Anime: Colourcloud Palace, Jigoku Shoujo 2.


Don't blame me. I've got nothing to do! =)

sudah...

Presentation?
No more.

Assignments?
No more.

Quizzes?
No more.

Headaches during exams?
No more. hahaha...

Learning? Always....

The end of my undergraduate studies. =)
But learning...never ends. =)

busy but...

I'm starting to get busy. With LOP classes and all of the assignments and quizzes and coming midterms, this is what the student's real life should be. Busy and enjoyable. So sad that I can't study Japanese and Mandarin anymore. Not anymore, but no enough time. But somehow, I manage to sleep early. Weird huh...? Well, maybe that's the reason why I can't find time to open my 'Buku Pelajaran Jepun' and 'Mandarin for Everyone'. Aiyak...Forget to photocopy Fatimah's book!

I'm hoping to improve my English this semester for we have to do a lot of conversation in English instead of Bahasa. Minna san, o-shite kudasai onegai shimasu! (n_n)V

Pinjaman [?]

Pinjaman
Mata yang hitam pekat
Kulit yang putih bersih
Hidung mancung terletak
Bibir merah tersenyum manis
Bukanlah hak milik abadi
Hanyalah pinjaman

Pinjaman
Harta yang menimbun
Ilmu yang bergunung
Isteri yang tercinta
Suami yang tersayang
Juga bukan hak milik abadi
Hanyalah pinjaman

Pinjaman
Makin dipegang erat
Makin sayang untuk dilepaskan
Makin banyak memenuhi ruang
Makin sukar untuk diuruskan

Semuanya adalah pinjaman
Tiada yang milikan abadi
Tiada yang kekal.

p/s: Loan tak masuk lagi. Uuuuu...